TO A BETTER TOMORROW

I am just wondering

if you r not very wealthy but u can still survive
then one find day u met a wealthy person, okie, not very wealthy but better than urself person

and the qn is
would u or would u not then "stick" to the person for life

????????????

when I first met her
she is a very simple person
will tell us not to eat too exp coz this month budget tight
blah blah bah

and then now it evolved to
eat this, eat tt
do this, do tt
go here go there

I started thinking tt perhaps the guy really touched her with his true love
but now............
I dun know
seemed like he became the one who can give her a better life

I dun know
nothing wrong
coz both gotten what they wanted
a partner for life... a partner for a life of better life
=)

I dun know
I guess I have no rights to say anything
its all just my humble opinion

I just want everybody to be happy
but must be for the correct reason

jus like last time,
XX will never cook for me
XX will never bring me on a holiday
XX will never buy me any pressie
XX will never take photos with me

BUT NOW
all these stuff were being done with their current partners
sigh
whatever bah
not meant to be
not meant to be mine

maybe master is right
"no more le"
then why bother to do so many and end up with nothing in the end but heart break

old ones, young ones, same age ones
all also tried
"just enjoy the process bah' I was told
"dun go think so much. can work out then work out. no work out. then no work out lor" I was also told
so okie lor
just do it
none turned out well
so maybe "really no more le"

maybe really too used to being alone le
dun know how to give in to ppl and I want means I want
=D
or is it becoz I just want to be myself.... like or dun like.. all show.. u want, u accept, u cant, then bye bye
as simple as tt

sigh
sorry guys
not tt I want to be difficult or I dun want to find someone whom I can settle down with
but I think I am at the stage when I know what I want and what I dun want what I can accept and what I cant
so no force ah
force no happiness
if I ended with someone like dad... I think I rather not lor... dun want to think abt it too...
girls want guys who can lead and at times let us lead bah.. correct me if I am wrong bah

ANYWAY
just enjoy the process bah
=D

I CAN SLEEP

i was advised to google and looked for food tt aids sleeping
and hey presto!
whatever I am eating now.. all aids in sleeping wor
rice, potatoes, veg, blah blah blah

drink hot milk with honey before sleep...hm.. something which I did not try before.. coz I dun want to wake up in the middle of the night to go pee pee
whats the point right? I want to sleep thru out the night mah why disrupt my sleep just to go pee pee
tts why before sleep I dun drink water. I also dun wan to wake up the next day with swollen eyes.. u know swollen eyes

anyway
what actually caught my attention was this:-

dun keep saying tt u cant sleep and kept waking at what time what time and then can't sleep back
coz it will send a neg signal to the body to "cant sleep. to wake up. cant sleep back"

BINGO
*clap hands*
I think its very true leh

just like ppl keep saying "be positive. breathe positive. stay positive"
HUAT AH!!
dun attract the neg ions to urself
keep  and only attract the positive ones... and repel away all the neg one
*clap hands*

so hor
I am gg to think POSITIVELY!!!
=D
I CAN SLEEP!!

HUAT AH!!!

sleep tight baby
=D
*yawn*

OVER DRINK

wonder what was gg thru her mind when she down 29 glasses of hard liquor

to earn more monies? or its part of her job to drink so much? or she is very thirsty tt day?

so young.. less than 30 nia
and "gao teng kee"
sigh

life is precious.... do treasure it
once gone... never come back...

Bless U

I WANT TO ZZZ

really
seriously
frankly
I also dun know what to do le

1 month plus le bah
I still cannot sleep

and this AM I woke up at 130am and owl all the way
=(

WTF
seriously!!

what happened!!!!??!!??

ORH BAK KAR PRINCESS

I went down to temple to pray the 2nd time
hm.. ya, u r rite
I still cant sleep

though she said will take out one project from me if need be
I still wake up in the middle of the night leh
=(
I guess to me, I told u thrice le
u did not do anything abt it
just smiled at me
so now tt u decided if need be, u will remove 1 from me, to me, its too late de
it does not help me any more
all the more I am more determine to leave....

coz to me, if u really mean it, u would have told me to pass the project out to someone
and not "if need be"

anyway can sleep or cannot sleep
I just take it bah...what can I do rite
take it as go to work on time lor
then sleep early in the evening
till I get another job.. if not.. hang in there
but I think sooner or later... if I am so deprive of sleep.. then I will have to go
with or without a job
coz health to me more impt

though I woke up and be owl and I still try my best to sleep again
but nothing seemed to work leh
I just cant get back to sleep
but I am not thinking of anything
or stress abt anything

tt day was the worst, I slept abt 1130pm.. woke up at 115am.. and then ho say... all the way.. owl
and when I got to work, I was very alert
the moment I knock off... omg!!
I almost want to sleep on my way home from work

this month gg to be a busy month for me
coz the exam is on 25th may....need to study
I looked at the notes.. all the words.. sianz
and just close the file
hehe
>.<
jia you!!

hope I pass
its just a cert
but its BOSS de KPI
so must give it my best shot

YOU AGAIN?

I stopped gg for events for a long time
decided to pick it up again after I remember one of the male participant told me "go for the porridge buffet. can meet many ppl"
and so when I saw it, I decided to sign up for it

I thought I should not be meeting so many "familiar" faces rite
afterall I have not been joining events for a very long time
but then.. sigh

almost half were familiar faces lor
until got one even asked me "long time never join le?"
steady rite

I met the ah tiong who refused to admit he is one, and now he has an ang mo name "鸟伸"
and this "uncle" who I met when I first joined events many many donkey years again
I think I know why he still here

our conversation went like this
"u still joining events?"
"yes"
"u still looking for ur mr right?"
"u mean u r not looking for ur ms right?"
"no. I m not looking.  my age now. I stopped looking le. for what.. blah blah blah"
*auto shut down*
"oh, so u mean, today u come here to eat de huh?"
*stunned* "erm.. no la. come make friends lor. u know la, ur criteria must changed le. must lower. blah blah blah"
*auto shut down*  I think he is telling himself lor
"oh yes, of course, when u r younger, and now tt u r older, the things u want and u see are different le, of course will change la. must know what u know"
totally cant be bothered to talk to him
if he only want to come and eat, then stay home, go down stairs ta bao and eat in the comfort of ur home bah

and then I tell u I almost fainted then he drank his coffee
whats wrong with picking up ur cup and sip leh?
he took the teaspoon and *slurp slurp slurp*
damn fucking bloody loud!!!
I mean okie, ur call, if u want to drink it tt way, but this is a dating event lor
I just stared at him with eyes big big
speechless

up to the ppl la
I mean... sigh... if u want to "complain" tt u cannot find then u first look at urself and do some reflection bah
why always say others here no right, there no right, when the problem lies in ur
SO OBVIOUS!!

anyway the way he sits hor, I tell u
u also faint
I think he thinks he is at home, so comfy
and just ...hm.. dun know how to say, like the chair is the couch like tt...
sigh
whatever
I still will wish him all the best la

I also met the "smelly down there" guy
we smiled at each other
but when it comes to rotation, I did not speak to him
I mean, for wat
HE IS HISTORY

sigh
think really cannot keep gg to events
coz will meet same face and weird ppl too

and I seemed to always attract the younger guys
why huh?
where are my age grp de?
all taken??

think must seriously consider younger guys bah
got this one
refused to tell me his age
but I told him tt he is too young for me
so mai waste time
think he really dun know what is a NO  and wont give up
said we are meant to be together and one day I will accept him
I told him to stop dreaming and mai waste time le

tts the thing abt events hor
u never know who u will meet
anyway two more events for this month....
one more is makan de and the other is bake a cake
=D

think better find something I like to do, make friends with same interests
rather then go with a mindset to find a hubby better
coz I think no new blood
keep seeing same faces

CALL ME DETECTIVE CHAN

I dreamt tt when I grew old.. I stayed in a one room one hall flat
=(

was I happy?
hm...
cant really tell in the dreams
but at least I had friends with me... not lonely

anyway the dream is not abt me staying in a one room one hall flat, but rather I was like a detective and a grp of us were investigating

duhz

ya, tell me abt it
DUH