"NOBODY LOVES YOU"

today we went to pray at the temple and the "santuary"?
dun know wats the place called....coz its not a cementry
anyway, papa was telling bil how our grandparents used to love his elder daughter so dearly
and then the little one went "yee yee, nobody loves u"
and i looked at her and smiled
"its ok, nobody loves me. has been like this all these while"

seriously, since the day i started to understand things
i am never the apple of anybody's eyes
so why bother
duh
why bother to be upset, i mean
nothing new......coz at times i do feel sad but what can i do, rite?

this yr, i also decided not to get any cny goodies for the old folks le
and guess what??!???
they were actually EXPECTING me to get
WTH!!
so when papa asked sis just now when is she gg to get the bak kwa, sis went "not sis buying meh?"
and i went "nopie"
and then papa told sis "its ok. u just remember to give $50 to mama for the cny stuff"
swee!!!

sis is just expected to give $50 for the cny stuff, and i am EXPECTED to get all the cny goodies for them and on top of tt $50
sigh
its not tt i "meow" or what
but have i been appreciated for all these things tt i have been doing and contributing
sigh
=(
its ok, every now and then, i tell myself
its ok de
want to do, then happy happy do
dun want to do, then dun do
so this yr, i choose not to do
FOR WHAT??!!?
do so many but in their eyes only sis lor
not tt i jealous or what, but since not appreciated and since i no happy doing it, then do for what
might as well dun do

sigh
though i like this say
but i still went to place order for the yu sheng, i still place order for the cny cake and i still am gg to buy goodies back home lor
pui
kns!!
hahaha
i guess, tts just me
as simple as tt
say say only but will still do
but i am very sure, one fine day, i will not want to do it anymore

like what the little one said "yee yee, nobody loves u"
since nobody loves me, then i must love myself even more!!!
=))
*beam beam*
then why spend money on others who dun appreciate, might as well spend it on myself

this is just so much ME!!!!