A PIECE OF MY MIND

just shouted at mama
she hor
really pushing her luck
just becoz i diam diam she just happily continue to shoot

give up!!!
AND DECIDED TO GIVE her a piece of my mind
and tts when i "roared" back at her

she was saying "dun buy the shinning wrappers anymore. difficult to wrap. blah blah blah"
and i told her "also not i buy one okie"
and she went "i telling u not to buy. its so exp also"
and i went ' told u not i buy one. so exp i wont buy lor. i buy 40 cents one and its paper"
"ya la. i telling u dun buy shinning one"
and i burst out "not i buy one, u tell me for what. go and tell the one who bought it'

seriously, tell me for what?  go tell the one who bought it right?
*speechless*
skin itchy lor, its all i can say
but hor then again, if not get the wrapper for her, she will also say no wrapper de
so hor, duhz


then next she decided to talk abt the pumpkin and carrots which i bought
said the carrot so exp $5 bucks why buy 5. so many. how to finish
and i kept quiet.
then she said oragnic one is it?
and i nodded
then she continued " next time dun buy le. so exp and buy so many, just buy one will do."
and i went " also not ask u to one meal finish all mah. who asked u to cook all"
"pumpkin also so big. dun buy next time."
and i went ' supposed to cook on sunday for u. u dun want"
then she went "where got? sunday also no cook"
and i went ' i asked u whether u want to eat pumpkin porridge. u said dun want de hor. so i no cook right?"
and she still want to say "sunday no cook"
and i repeated myself tt its she dun want when i offered to cook for her

then she still want to say " u dun know my schedule. u dun go marketing. u dun buy la. so exp. i want to eat i will buy myself" and she blah blah blah on
then i went "its becoz u r sick now then buy something slightly better for u to eat, if u r healthy, one carrot also cant be bother to buy for u lor. i never ask u to one day cook all and eat. u can slowly cook the food. anyway like i said i am not gg to buy for u anymore, u want to eat or u dun want to eat tts ur problem. just dun come and tell me tt u cannot do the chemo or whatever complain"

and best still tell me " i never complain, its who complain"
and i went "ya. i dun care who complain, or whatever, just dun come and tell me anymore about u cannot do chemo and who is unhappy and make noise. i dun want to know anything, u can do or u cannot do the chemo. just want u to eat something better coz u r sick. then can continue with the chemo.  then nobody complain and make noise. all happy.  next time u just buy and eat what u want. i dun want to know. dun bother to tell me"

and then silence...............

i may have sounded bad and rude
but this time i really dun feel bad about it

if its sister who bought them, i am sure she wont make such comment lor
and for goodness sake, now is really becoz cant do chemo, i just want to boost up her low palate so tt she can do the chemo and papa wont go make noise and upset her further
tts all i want
but here i am doing stuff for her, there she thinks its a waste of money and this and tt
i want to tell her, if she dun want to boost up her low palate and continue not able to do the chemo, then might as will what also dun do... coz dun waste any more money and time and effort
really u know
made me so mad at times
sigh

of course easy for me to say
coz not i sick mah
she must be feeling lousy too
but what to do right

like they said when life gives u lemon, make lemonade!!!

HUAT AH!!!