LAST EVENING...

i joined an event yesterday
since gg for the xinyao concert last evening i thought, well why not since nearby mah

and boy!!! was i so so... erm.......... i simply want to go home!!!
hahaha
okie la, not tt bad actually
maybe i very long not join events liao
so u know la, things changed

one 58 guy joined
not bad la actually, nice chap
so he introduced tt he is now unemployed coz he needs to look after his mama
so i said ya, mama sick le must take care
then i asked u dun have siblings?
and he said his siblings all have committment (own family) so he being the single one, together with his younest bro will take turn, if he is busy with other stuff
so i went futher what were u working as previously then before u decided to quit and look after ur mum
and he said he used to be a security guard working in a fish farm in CCK which has since closed down coz business no good
oh... so he did not resigned......just so nice tt it closed down and he just took the opp to look after mama
nice chap right
but some how, just dun click
hm... he said his mama old, need ppl to look after, he also old also need to take care
and i was like erm.. so u want a maid or social service?
our conversation just dun click
he kept asking me how many bangalesh workers i have since i am a contracts manager
duhz
so at a stage i just let him yak lor
and smile politely

then came another guy whom i met in earlier events
he dun remember me but does not matter
40 plus too
told me tay oing hui's age and he really took good care of himself
very busy man coz he opened a restaurant
dun asked me where coz he was sharing with me about his date 2 weeks back with this lady who wanted to be his gf whom he rejected nicely
and tt he not gg to date christians coz cant click with them esp one of his gf is one and made him go church which he had since stopped
and he told me he dun make the first move so ladies need to contact him first
and best he said he wont make an effort to remember the ladies coz too many le which explained why he dun remember me
and i was like BYE BYE


so there was these other 2
also met in earlier events
but also dun remember me
already had my contact bah... but both still asked for mine
and i said nah sorry
i mean.. ya, nah sorry
not becoz u dun remember me, its becoz if fated hor, long ago click liao in the earlier events

what i like about some of the guys is even though we met at earlier events
after sometimes some how or rather we became "dating events" friends
hahaa
when its their turn at my table, we will update each other
talked like old friends
or even said okie toilet break or take a break
and we will some how just chat like old friends
some hor, they ji tao bo heel. sit there press phone which i though rude la
even if i am not ur cup of tea but...try to be nice la
unless of course is we hate each other to the bones then okie or
pess the phone or go away dun sit at the table

and then the jing dian
this guy asked me do u exercise
i said i used to join kick boxing and zumba but now no time le
and he said well u should go for yoga
and i went but yoga too slow for me
and he said ppl ur age hor should not be doing kick boxing u know the bones are vulnerable blah blah blah
and knee cap will wear very quickly
and i replied u know there are ladies in my kick boxing classes also very "40 ish or 50 ish" but they can kick box much better than me, and they maintained very well. and i do think whatever exercise will also cause the knee cap to wear and tear
and he went ya unless u do swimming but then u will have broad shoulders which i think the ladies dun want tt right
and i was like ya okie, enough of ur hints tt i am OLD
i got u LOUD and CLEAR dun need to be on repeat mode
and then i asked him back so how often u run?
and he went oh now not tt often coz busy at work and i so wanted to tell him running also will wear and tear ur knee cap and it does not matter how old u r... but i decided well u r my last male participant so i shall be graceful about it

so u asked me hows the event yesterday
i got to say i met a few guys whom i would like to know furhter
but i am very sure, i am also older than them
but what to do
apparently it seemed to be the trend now bah

leave it to fate bah

but if u asked me about the xinyao concert
well i got to tell u
BEST leh
i mean not best of the best
but i enjoyed myself
and i was like OMG i know the songs!!!!!
kekeke
really really old songs which we used to listen or sing too when we were young....
would have been long forgotten
but last night it all came back
memories flow i tell u
no joke

i very the peifu the lady beside me
i think she cant really see well
but she can also sing to every song
and mind u she cant see the lyrics on the screen but she can sing almost all the songs
coz like me some of the groups are "WHO R U?" hahaha
never hear before
but they really sang well
 WELL DONE!! Well done xinyao
thanks for accompanying us ..........came such a long way

100 DAYS

its mama's 100th day
so fast hor
7th may ..........

thought all moved on... i mean slowly bah
can't be overnight

BUT today at mandai i realised
yuan lai, i have yet to move anywhere
sigh
yeah
i cried

actually already low but then i did not want to cry
it was when dad said " dar, i missed u very much"
i broke down
i think it must have been difficult for him
for me, i still can focus on other stuff only when i am back home then i cry lor
for dad, he is home everyday, what can he do....

then he continued " dont worry about me. i will be better. slowly"
and tts it, i got to walk away.........

the little one cried too
but i guess she just sad bah
afterall mama loved her so muchie
from baby to JC leh... waiting to go Uni

sigh
i guess slowly bah
i will be better

this year grandma said mai celebrate her birthday coz very close to mama's 100 day
but i am sure mama wants all to be happy and well
and not to be sad

i keep telling myself
mama's time here is up so she just left earlier but we will meet one day too, when i time is up here
but i just cannot ...................its very easy to say
but i am just so so so sad
i really missed her terribly

when i remembered tt dream the other day
i really am very sad
i know she needs to go le and cant come see me anymore
but but but
i sure cannot
i cant let it go...........

well
i just wish mama is at a happier place
where she no pain no whatever
okie maybe not wish, i know she is

LOVE U MAMA
i really miss u

BAD SHAPE

i had a dream this AM
woke up crying

mama came into my dream again
as usual, i dun get to see her face but some how i knew it was her
i was hugging her from waist down
and then she was like sayang-ing me
then she said "u got to be good and take good care of urself. i wont be coming to see u any more?"
i was very upset and asked mama "why not? please dun do tt to me"
she just told me tt i just have to take good care of myself.
then i begged her not to go and woke up crying both in my dream and in reality

sigh
why like this one
what kind of dream is this
really tsk tsk

i was in very bad shape today
and to make matter worst, today is ndp observance day
so majority was in red and of course i was in black la
i did thought of wearing red today de
but when i woke up crying this AM, i decided to go black
and everyone was asking me "why r u in black?'
and i replied tt i only have black lor

and then this snake must come and piss me off
"SY, why u like me? not in red? " and she laughed
i looked at her and just smile
then she said again
and this time i looked at her and said "my mama just passed away recently and u want me to wear red just becoz its nation birthday?  if u think i should wear red, then sorry lor. i am not. my fault okie, sorry"
then she diam and then followed with "but there is a period u can wear le right?"
i totally fired up and went " i dun know la i was told not to wear so i just follow lor"
i mean WTF is this even ur fucking problem??!!?!??!  i want to wear what is my problem is it even urs to be bother with ??
really knn

then she went "hey, u dun be angry la. i forgot ur mama passed away."
and i looked at her and said "its okie."  i wanted to add on "its okie coz its none of ur business to remember"
but i think i should not scoop to her brainless and insensitive level

anyway today is i ownself not in tip top condition
so should not blame her or any one
my own fault

but i am really very sad mah
i mean well, i am really very sad
well i guess i am jusr made of water... jus love to cry

and then came another pc of news
there is gg to be a wind blow... how big the wind i dun know... but its gg to affect any one... and i mean ANY ONE
sigh

i was like controlling myself the whole day
controlling myself = DUN BREAKDOWN AND CRY
i keep telling myself "its okie its okie" gg home soon........
and who knows got to work late

and best when big boss asked so can i have the costing by tonight, my reply was "cannot. no. i want to go home and sleep"
duhz
i think the big wind will blow me away.........
>.<

and then evening time, while i was busy trying to get the work done, tt snake came and disturb me again
"SY, u working late ah....hahahhaa"
really KNN liao
so i went "is it very funny tt i worked late?'
and she said " i happy then i laugh i never say its funny"
then i went " u mean u very happy tt i working late tts why u are laughing?'
then she went "hey u dun like this la, dun angry. i just happy tts why i laugh"
then i went "i dun see anything so funny about it or happy"
and she went " its becoz u working late with us AGAIN mah (coz yesterday i worked late too)"
and then i went "why dun u come at 8am too and work with me lor"
and she said " i know u worked early.  u hardworking lor"
then i went "so u give me ur salary la, since i am hardworking"
i mean come on lor
really tmd
today she just pissed me off
if she no more medicine, please go see the doc and jiak yok timely

but i think i am just not in good condition la
i am still very upset
*sob sob*